I'm pretty sure I made the right decision.

apparently the middle school band teacher and the kindergarten teachers did not confer when planning the holiday concerts this year.  or maybe they just assumed that if you have a middle schooler, you most likely don't (or shouldn't) have a kindergartener.  or vice versa.  and this is probably true in most cases.  but, as you know, we're not the norm.  I just so happen to have BOTH a sixth grader AND a kindergartener.  with a couple kids in between to keep things lively.

as a result of this poor planning (actually, I really have no idea why), the 6th grade band concert and the kindergarten Christmas program were scheduled on the same night, at the same time.

that left me with a difficult decision to make: do I attend my sixth grader's first ever band concert, or watch my kindergartener sing her heart out? Gary and I had already decided that he would go to one and I would go to the other.  but as THE MOM, I felt like I deserved first pick.  I mean I did give birth to these people, so that was only fair.  right?

tip of the day: if all else fails, pull out the childbirth card.  it trumps everything.

in the end, I chose to go to Chloe's concert. (shoot, this really stinks.  because kindergarteners are so darn cute, too!)

out of the three oldest, I'd say Chloe has been the toughest to get to know.  quiet and shy by nature, she's not one to express her thoughts and feelings very often, if at all.  even when I ask her how things are going, a lot of times she'll just shrug her shoulders or if I'm lucky, she might mumble out a one word answer.  now if I could just put her and my eldest in a bag and mix them up, life would be grand.

fortunately, as parents, we have that capability to look past our children's weaknesses and love them for who they are.  far beyond that quiet exterior of hers, I see a blossoming young woman, bursting with beauty, strength, intelligence and kindness.

on the way to the concert, I asked if she was nervous.  not really, she said.  and then the rest of the drive consisted of me asking questions and her giving one word answers.

once at the school, Chloe went to join her class, and I headed to the gym to grab a seat.  it was already packed, but I happened to spot an empty chair in the second row, on the aisle even.  sweet.  I had no sooner sat down when the lady next to me leans over and says, "I hope you don't mind, but we have seven kids and they might be racing in and out quite a bit."  you guys, I'm not even going to lie and say I held it together.

"WOW, seven?!  that's great!  I have nine myself."(wait.  are we talking kids here or pairs of jeans?) judging by the look on her face, I don't think she believed that there could actually be someone crazier than her that existed.

while I waited for the program to begin, sure enough, the seven kids (and their mom) kept filing in and out.  at one point, when they were once again "out", a couple walked up and asked if the two seats next to me were available.  before I could answer, the lady behind me pipes up, "no, those people have like 20 kids.  they definitely need ALL those chairs."  keep.mouth.shut.

pre-program entertainment right THERE.

as you've probably gathered by now, Chloe plays the clarinet.  she says she likes it, so we'll see if she continues or not.  again, hard to know what she's thinking.

I'm such a bawl baby when it comes to these events.  my eyes get all watery and I have to concentrate on holding them open so the tears won't spill over. this time, I wanted to tap the guy in front of me and point to Chloe and say, "see that girl right there?  the shy one sneaking peeks over here... I love her. no, seriously... you have no idea.  I LOVE her.  and I'm so lucky she's mine."

the sixth grade band has 80 students this year and they were extraordinary.

on the drive home, we were both quiet for awhile.  it was Chloe that finally broke the silence.

"mom," she said.

"what?" I asked, assuming she wanted to get a treat or something.

in her shy, quiet voice she tells me, "thanks for coming."

WAAAAA!

-jessica

PS. have you tried the cranberry bliss bars at Starbucks?  if not, don't go charging over there quite yet.  try making your own first.  apparently the homemade ones trumped Starbuck's version.