sixty things I've said to my kids.

1.) what do you mean you’re still hungry
2.) don’t touch that, it’s hot
3.) go to bed, I’m tired
4.) don’t step in that
5.) did you step in that
6.) I told you it was hot
7.) leave your brother alone
8.) ew, go wipe that off
9.) get that out of your mouth
10.) quit your whining
11.) okay what happened
12.) does that belong on the floor, I don’t think so
13.) put that down
14.) stop talking and eat your dinner
15.) get over here
16.) get over there
17.) stop picking your nose
18.) don’t wipe that on me
19.) where did all this water come from
20.) stop it, that’s disgusting
21.) what's that on your clothes
22.) how would you like it if I did that to you
23.) did you hear what I just said
24.) okay fine, go get the Band-Aids
25.) how about we play The Quiet Game
26.) what do you have in your mouth
27.) go put your dirty dish in the sink

EGAD!!!

28.) why are my shoes in the bathtub
29.) put away your clothes PLEASE
30.) get back in the house right now
31.) are you trying to kill yourself or what
32.) that’s not funny
33.) go wash that off
34.) wait, you’re going to jump off of what
35.) don’t come crying to me, you started it
36.) yes I heard you the first time
37.) don’t do that at the table
38.) pick that up and put it back where it belongs
39.) what's that on your face
40.) don't talk with food in your mouth
41.) don’t shove things up your nose
42.) put that back we’re about to eat dinner
43.) what did I just tell you
44.) what. did. I. just. tell. you.
45.) don’t throw that in the house
46.) where are your pants
47.) stop that you’re getting food everywhere
48.) get away from the street
49.) close the door
50.) it’s okay you’re not bleeding anywhere
51.) alright who did this
52.) JUST TRY IT
53.) what did you just say to me
54.) let go of that, he had it first
55.) get back in bed
56.) what's that smell
57.) but you ate the green beans before
58.) no we’re not having cake for dinner
59.) go clean your room
60.) if I have to come back up those stairs again 

being a parent is not like something else at all.

-jessica